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  • MELODY: An attractive and serious sun worshipper.
  • GREG: A gentle young man in his 20s. He has been blind from birth.
  • ZIG: A large man in his 50s. He is able to bellow and chew on a cigar simultaneously.
  • DECKER: A successful, energetic businessman, around 40 years old.
  • RICHIE: in his 20s. His personal habits and hygiene are disgusting.
  • MARVIN: A professional gambler, 30 or so.
  • CHEERLEADER: A hyperactive teenage fanatic.
  • ROSE: Zig's wife of 30 years and a closet Cub fan.
  • THE KID: A little kid or teenager.
  • THE GUARD: A big guard.
  • ANNOUNCER (Offstage role): The in stadium game announcer.
  • BOZO the Clown (Offstage role): Leads the 7th Inning Stretch.

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